It can be a difficult and stressful time when the decision has to be made to move an elderly parent into a care home. A lot of things can be at play here, whether they are suffering from dementia and can make their own decisions, the feelings of the rest of the family and a whole series of practical considerations as well. Here are some top tips on how to deal with these issues practically whilst also being respectful of everyone’s feelings.
Is Your Parent Capable Of Making Their Own Decisions
This is a great place to start your decision-making process, to assess how much your parent is capable or otherwise of properly making their own decisions? The reason for a move into residential care is usually either to do with mental capacity, as in a form of dementia, or a physical restriction, or even both. If they are suffering from dementia then the decision may be too much for them, especially if they are further on with this disease. If they really can’t make their own decisions then it may make sense to apply for power of attorney over their affairs, which means you are responsible for making all their decisions in their best interests.
How Does The Rest Of The Family Feel
If like discussed above, you have power of attorney then it’s important to be sure any other siblings or members of the family have a chance to voice an opinion. There are few things more divisive in these situations than other family members thinking you are assuming control, even if you feel you are acting in your parent’s best interests, not everyone always sees what’s best in the same manner as you do.
Have They Voiced An Opinion
Even if your parent cannot fully make decisions in their own right it shouldn’t mean you should completely disregard their views and opinions. Discuss the plans and make sure they at least know where they are going and why.
What About Their Possessions?
You may not want to think about this, but there is a time when they will pass on and not be there so you will need an estate planning attorney to make sure that their will and what they want doing with their possessions is honored. Hopefully they will already have a will but it pays to make sure it is up to date and suitable for the current situation as it’s not something that everyone thinks about in the normal run of things.
Their Home Rent It Out Or Sell It On
If they are moving on you might want to consider what to do with their home when they go into care, do you sell it on or rent it out? You may not be ready to sell for emotional reasons or even just not want to have the house move out of the family, you can consider renting it out as a temporary measure. If you are renting it makes sense to prepare the house for rental as it may not be up to code especially if your parent has been there for a long time.