How to zombie-proof your home


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Halloween, the time when boys and girls dress up in the hopes of receiving treats from their neighbours, and where the adults dress up to out-do each other and get drunk. This time of year is also vital for the classic monster; where the witches, mummies, and Frankenstein’s monsters are able to roam the streets without fear of angry mobs and flaming torches.

As the monster madness takes place another sinister force comes along. The graveyards become disturbed by the resurrection of gruesome zombies, causing destruction and wreaking havoc. These monsters roam the streets in the hope of feeding on human brains. Some are good some are malevolent; these ones will wreak havoc on innocent people.

Despite the scary appearance and violent behaviour, it is possible to survive the dominance of the brain thirsty zombies, by understanding how to recognise a zombie and exploit their weaknesses you are capable of improving your house whilst zombie proofing it.

 

For those who have watched many horror movies will know what to look for when spotting a zombie and have an advantage on those who are unable to view on-screen horror. However do not fear there are a few obvious giveaways to identify a zombie.

The first is its inability to talk, instead they groan, low and slow. This will give them away and allow you time to run to safety.

Another is the constant need to feed on human brains. Some zombies may look like a normal person, but if they keep saying things like “can you smell brains?” or “that would go great with brains”.

Finally is the sudden violence when they spot a human. If you see a figure in the distance running towards you its probably best to run as fast as you can away from it.

Zombies, although notoriously hungry and difficult to run from, they have multiple weaknesses. These include: being slow, not particularly smart, not strong, and have weak heads, so a quick whack to the skull should have them falling to the floor instantly.

 

When it comes to keeping yourself safe during the zombie invasion there are easy measures to take without your home becoming a part of the rubble most apocalyptic houses become.

One of these precautions is the use of barbed wire. Although can normally make a place look more like a prison than a home. It can be placed anywhere around the house, on walls, windowsills, and at the bottom of doors, this prevents zombies from being able to get to your house. As well as keeping the zombies out, it also adds to the aesthetic of the holiday, with barbed wires perfectly emulating the Halloween spirit.

The best way to keep the pesky zombies out is with simple wooden boards, nail them to any exposed windows or doorways, this will definitely keep the zombies out. These boards will give the house a rustic feel bringing in the autumn season during the zombie apocalypse.

A final example of keeping your home and family safe is by turning the long forgotten basement into a fort. Locking yourself in with the correct provisions and homely accessories will enable you to bunker down for safety whilst keeping that feeling of home close to you in your time of need.

 

In the end, with your new found knowledge, you should be able to spot any zombie from a safe distance, helping you fend off the swarm of brain hungry pests. Recognising their weaknesses will help protect you.

With these hints you should be able to prepare your home for the zombie take over, using everyday building materials to keep your house secure whilst ensuring it stays looking aesthetically pleasing.


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