The weather is crisp, the seasonal songs are inescapable, the shopping lists are being compiled and the tree is being selected. It’s that time of year again, but before you get carried away by the outdoor lighting display at your local DIY shop, take a look at our top 30 crazy Christmas houses to know how not to decorate your home. There is always one in every neighbourhood, so read on to make sure that you won’t be that person causing sleepless nights, and not from the anticipation of the big day either!
#30. Don’t let toddlers decorate!
That old adage of if you’re going to do something, do it properly springs to mind when looking at this …..arrangement for want of a better word. The haphazard way they have seemingly flung these lights up into the trees, hoping for the best, looks more psychotic than pretty. They would have done better to have left them out altogether or have opted for a plain and simple light display instead.
#29. Look Mum, Santa’s Passed Out!
If you are opting for inflatable decorations this year, it’s definitely worth thinking about how they will look during the day when they aren’t on. This assortment of drunk and disorderly Christmas characters makes this home look like a place of ill repute, not exactly what the holiday season is all about.
#28. The Lazy Approach
Definitely, don’t take this approach, it might seem funny at the time, however, after a day or two it will quickly look like a cheap effort and nobody wants that to be said about their home. It’s the lighting equivalent of forgetting someone’s birthday and re-gifting them a promotional stress ball that you got at work.
We shouldn’t have to tell you this, but remember Christmas is a family holiday so please keep it, clean folks. This might seem like a great idea after a mulled wine too many but think of the children on your street before you reenact last night’s joke. Please, we beg you!
#26. Urinating Father Christmas Anyone?
Why oh why was this idea even on the table? We all know he has a tough job with limited pit stop breaks, but we don’t want to see our beloved Christmas hero defiled thus.
#25. Loopy Footpath
The addition of these bizarre arches to this home‘s decoration is not only superfluous but also an eyesore. If there are that many lights already staple-gunned to your home then you can forgo these ridiculous hoops, trust us.
#24. Red Riding House
Please try to limit the amount of bright red lights in your display, we are aware it is a Christmas colour but this is a little excessive. In order to make your Christmas lights tasteful, pick out certain details of your home instead of covering it completely!
#23. Death by Snowflakes
Clearly, this Texan homeowner has never heard of too much of a good thing and the overall effect is real estate, Christmas themed smallpox. If you want to feature a particular theme or shape, you can do better than just sticking a bunch of them on your home willy nilly, or even just scaling them down to make it easier on the eye.
#22. Neverland’s Driveway
This house has so much going on, the nativity scene, giant inflatable teddy bears, a huge Santa Claus and even a giant gingerbread man. With too many clashing themes it just looks like a complete mess, so pick one and stick with it peeps.
#21. Candy Cane House
It didn’t work for Hanzel and Grettle, so it won’t work out for your own home either, Grimm indeed.
#20. Tacky Christmas Everybody!
THERE IS JUST SO MUCH PLASTIC! It’s amazing how many people struggle to decorate in style over Christmas, full marks if you can spot the front door.
#19. Revenge of The Snowmen
Continuing on with the concept of too much of a good thing, this terrifying collection of light-up snowmen crowding this front garden, is sure to put off any relatives and well-wishing neighbours popping over for dinner during the holiday season. Scale back people, we promise it won’t hurt you too much.
#18. Frenzied Front Garden
They even have a snowman riding a motorbike and a giant bauble hanging from their tree, that alone says enough. Is it just us or is that snowman in the bottom right corner absolutely terrifying?
#17. Spot The Christian’s House
We all know that Jesus was born this time of year and that is the real reason behind the turkey roast dinner and frenzied present opening. However, you don’t need to spell it out in your Christmas lights for our benefit, we get the message thanks.
#16. Christmas Dies In Paradise
The worst part of this display is the wasted potential of using the reflection in the water. If the colours were less garish and the design on the jetty more appealing, then the effect could be beautiful, instead, this arrangement looks like a Vegas show on tour.
#15. Anyone Up For A Bit Of Christmas Lazer Quest?
This household is clearly paranoid that Father Christmas won’t be able to find them. Well now, there is no way on earth he would be able to safely land his sleigh on their roof without inflicting permanent retinal scarring on himself and his poor reindeer.
#14. Is That Supposed To Be Mistletoe?
Alice in Wonderland meets Christmas lights, is the only way we can think to describe this psychedelic catastrophe.
#13. Santa’s Workshop Of Horrors
If you don’t stumble over the train set in front of the garden gate, then we dare you to find the front door to this house.
#12. My Name Is: Neon Shapes Galore
Back in 2012, when the UK was still riding the wave of the Olympics and the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee, this family in Bristol went a bit bonkers on their lights display. It even made it into a national newspaper, well done to them. However if you want to make your home look like a street in Tokyo, then here is a great template for you.
#11. Barbie Invites You To Her Magical Christmas Castle
Pink, check, Father Christmas, check, Christmas trees, check, check, check. This house is Barbie’s Christmas fantasy come true.
#10. Graph Paper House
The amount of lines on this house reminded us of using our maths exercise books at school, not exactly what you want to think about during the Christmas holidays.
#9. The Concept, Less Is More, Never Made This Far
Let’s just put it this way, you definitely wouldn’t want to bring a date back to this house!
#8. Liberace Does Christmas
It’s pink, it’s flamboyant, it’s ridiculous – it’s Liberace Baby!
#7. White Christmas – The Deleted Scene
Blindingly white lights have one positive aspect, it’s an effective burglar deterrent. Who needs an Ace alarm system with this bright display in place?
#6. If Coca-Cola Did Christmas Houses
Apparently, people flock to this house as a holiday attraction. Yup we can see why.
#5. Psychotic Reaction
We don’t think they could try any harder on this house, the obsessiveness with which they attacked their decorating is extreme.
#4. In A Word: Ridiculous
We aren’t sure where to begin with on this one, but from the overstuffed front porch, to the sugar paste roof tiles and the Christmas tree made out of raindrops, this is a horror show unlike any other.
#3. A Christmas Fit For A King
I think even the King (Elvis) himself would pass on this one.
#2. Please Make It Stop
If your house could talk and it is saying this, then you know you have done something wrong.
#1. World’s Worst Christmas House Is:
Come on Great Britain you’re better than this. Technically not a house but a pub, this is a travesty and a potential fire hazard to boot, with that amount of fir tree and electricity going on, we pray that their sockets check out. Let’s leave the tacky displays to our American cousins across the pond from now on.